I Have An Irreverent Sense Of Humor

I hate it when people tell me that I have an... uh, irreverent sense of humor. And they always say it exactly like that - prefaced with a little pause and an "uh" or an "um". And instead of laughing, that is typically the response from people whenever I've said something that is totally hilarious.

Telling somebody that their humour is irreverent is pretty much the same as saying that it is obvious that they are trying to be funny, and that it is clear that they think that they're funny, but that nobody else on the planet thinks that they're even a tiny bit amusing. It's the same type of passive-aggressive bullshit "compliment" that my mother loves to make.

For example, a coworker was recently talking about how Japan has had to introduce women-only subway cars in order to deal with the issue of how two-thirds of female Japanese subway riders have reported being groped on crowded subway cars. A serious topic, but I thought I'd make a joke: "Wow, riding the subway in Japan sounds awesome!"

In the subsequent meeting with my manager and a lady from the HR department to address allegations that I'd admitted to being a depraved subway groper, I found myself reiterating over and over that I had just been trying to make a joke. And they kept responding that I had an... um, irreverent sense of humor, and that I needed to be more sensitive to others.

Anyway, to make a long story short, I'm not allowed to be "irreverent" at work anymore, which is total bullshit.

Drunken Friday the 13th Post

I really, really want to see the new Friday 13th movie. I normally don't go in for horror re-imaginings like this, but the TV ads look good and the posters look even better, and there are guys walking around in Jason costumes outside of the AMC theatre at Dundas Square. If it weren't for my hatred of lines and fear of large groups, I'd probably be at the late show right now.

Also, I overheard an obnoxious douche-bag that I work with saying that he couldn't be paid enough to go see that trash (in reference to the guys in the costumes promoting the film at Dundas Square, which is just down the street from my office), and that has made me want to see it all the more. It's funny how spite can be so motivational.

I'm thinking that I'll check it out after work on Monday. Tonight is all about drinking big cans of Molson and watching Cloverfield and playing Final Fantasy: Crisis Core.

I Got Caught Picking My Nose

I totally got caught picking my nose yesterday. I was at my desk, minding my own business, when a particularly large and crusty booger that was hiding out in an upper cavity of my right nostril started driving me completely insane. So naturally, my finger was in there about halfway to the second knuckle and I was just starting to get a good hold on the offending nugget, when my boss happened to walk right by. And I was so busted, so totally caught red-handed, that there was really no way for me to pretend that I didn't have my finger lodged nearly two knuckles deep into my nose, or even try and come up with an excuse. So I just sort of shrugged and then kept on picking away.

And that's kind of sad - this type of shit happens to me so regularly that I'm becoming completely desensitized to situations where I'm being gross. I have a feeling that my performance review is going to be pretty surreal this year.